Why we’re on the Post Office’s watch list

In so many ways, Sam is not a typical dog. This is how he wins over non-dog-people. He doesn’t ask for attention, he doesn’t fetch, he silently observes people and situations…sometimes he’s downright boring. Before long folks are petting his sleeping form and confessing, “I don’t usually like dogs…but this dog is funny.” And he is.

Sam…wasting time until dinner

Turns out he’s also a public menace. Last week we got a letter from the U.S. Postal Service that read:

I am writing to make you aware of problems that our carrier is having with your dog. Yesterday, July 14, she was chased by your dog into the neighbors yard. This is unacceptable. Dog threats are a very real concern for our letter carriers. Millions of dollars are spent each year on injuries our carriers sustain from dogs. It is postal policy that the mail will not be delivered to a home that presents a dog threat….

Sam was confined to the backyard when this happened. There’s a Sam-sized hole in the fence if you kick aside some boards, so he must have seen the mailperson coming, pushed aside the boards, bolted through the fence to terrorize her, and (here’s the kicker) – GONE BACK INSIDE THE FENCE. Geez. Only Sam would be so assured in his right-ness that he’d bust out of confinement only to re-enter confinement when the job was done.
I don’t blame the post office one bit. I wouldn’t want strange dogs barking and chasing me, and I told Sam that he was lucky he didn’t get pepper-sprayed. Or worse. He told me that this woman is part of an evil government-watch plan that involves aliens, Richard Simmons, and a national ban on bacon. Poor Sam…I’m afraid old age is starting to mess with his head.

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10 comments

  1. Pingback: Old dog, new tricks | Foxflat's Blog
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  6. Becca · August 12, 2010

    katie…i keep checking this hoping to find a new post about the large upcoming event taking place in your life.

    i’m starting to have second thoughts about not being there and seeing all of the sweet russian lady’s hard work on that b.e.a.u.tiful dress.

    my life feels empty not knowing the goings on of your life. is that weird? i mean there are no morning conversations or lunch time catch ups. speaking of, you should have seen this transcript today!

    i suppose this would have been more appropriately expressed in an email, but what is more fun than awkward friend.

    • foxflat · August 26, 2010

      awww…i Juuuust checked this. I can’t believe it’s been a month since I posted! I will try to do that this weekend. It certainly is quiet in this house…I was used to Rider, Sandra, and a lot of daytime conversations at work.

  7. Rachel · July 20, 2010

    SAM! What a rebel. So smart and sneaky. I’m torn between admiration for his skills and feeling like I want to reprimand him for being such a pint sized terror. Oh Sam-I-am. He’s so cute. Great post Katie!

  8. You know who... · July 20, 2010

    I think, since you have a postal-related story today, I am obliged to say that the Postal Regulatory Commission has a rate and service inquiry route as well as a complaint process to deal exactly with these serious allegations and matters.

    You can also check in with the Postal Service Inspector General’s office to ensure that it was actually Sam chasing said mail carrier.

    Though, looking down from the eye in the sky at your place, it appears Sam has bolted his confines in order to eat some hot dogs your neighbor put in the trash?

    • foxflat · July 21, 2010

      Chris, I forgot that I had a friend who not only worked for the Postal Service, but worked for them as a LAWYER. HAHAhhahah I love it.

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